Today my husband and I are celebrating our twelfth wedding anniversary. In those twelve years we have bought a house, had three wonderful children, and suffered the loss of my parents. I am sure that each of us had family and friends who were skeptical when we announced our engagement. Some wondered how on earth we would build a life together as two non-drivers. Others worried about our ability to care for future children, and if we would pass our visual impairments on to them. In fact I had an Opthomologist jump down my throat because I was being ” irresponsible” enough to possibly ” create limited offspring” when I politely declined her suggested genetic fetal testing options.
The truth is that I love being married to a visually impaired man. He gets exactly how I feel about my own struggles. He knows how frustrating it is to not be able to easily read street signs or to have to wait on a bus that’s exceedingly late. He also thinks our children are wonderful, and has no worries about our kids inheriting my Aniridia. I never have to wait on him to get home to drive me to the store or take the kids to the park. Don’t get me wrong, I know other VI people who are happily married to fully sighted people. It’s just that we are both fiercely independent, and I doubt that either of us would be down for a relationship with that sort of power imbalance.
There are good things about being a low vision couple. We have to work as a team, and we do a lot of things together that most couples do separately. For example, it takes a long time, and quite a bit of walking to get anywhere. We have hours of uninterrupted conversations just walking to the Walmart. Sure there are some challenges that come our way. Our kids get sick in the middle of the night, we cannot get somewhere on the bus, and we cannot run to the store for something we need last minute. We face these challenges head on together. We trust each other and we trust God. Between the three of us I know there is nothing we cannot accomplish! I cannot wait to see what things God has in store for the next twelve years of our marriage